I graduated my first homeschooler last year! It was a brand new chapter in my life – I had now successfully homeschooled one child from start to finish, and we had all survived! In fact, we better than survived! Blake received an academic scholarship to a private university, he maintained a 4.0 his Freshman year, and he was invited to be a part of several elite groups on campus. I wish I could say it was all me, but I know better. It was actually me just following God’s leading on how our homeschool should operate, and letting Him do the hard stuff!
And once that hard stuff had been accomplished, we all wanted to celebrate! But how?
We had recently moved and weren’t a part of any co-ops, nor was Blake interested in “graduating” with people he didn’t know. All of our family was in another state, so it didn’t seem right to ask all of them to travel to a ceremony down here. And then, there was the whole, “mom’s having a baby” thing. I didn’t feel like putting together a huge shin-dig, but this was my baby boy graduating! What was the “right” thing to do?
In the end, we went with casual because it fit our style better than something formal, but before I tell you about Blake’s graduation, let me give you a few ways to help you choose between formal and casual, and also how you can make your child’s homeschool graduation memorable no matter what you choose.
Why have a formal homeschool graduation?
*You are a part of a homeschool group that has a formal ceremony.
*Your child likes the pomp and circumstance a formal ceremony and celebration offers.
*Your child has struggled through school, and you want to reward their efforts in a public way.
*You enjoyed the ceremony of your high school graduation, and would like them to have a similar experience.
*Family and friends will be greatly disappointed if there isn’t a formal ceremony. (although, I have an answer to this later on…)
Why have a casual homeschool graduation?
*You are not a part of a homeschool group with a formal ceremony.
*You child sees such things as falderal and excess.
*You don’t have any family nearby.
*Your family is laid back and a formal ceremony wouldn’t be your “style.”
*You don’t have the budget/energy/time for a formal affair.
I’m sure you see your child and/or your family in one or the other. Probably without even looking at the lists, you know which your child would prefer and which your family would prefer, but no matter what option you choose – formal or casual – you should find a way to make it memorable for everyone involved.
NOTE: I tend to lean toward making it about your child, and not about the expectations of others. You want this moment to be memorable for your child more than anyone else, so keep that in mind as you plan.
How to Make Graduation Memorable.
*Send real invitations. I know in this day and age, Facebook invites and email invites are all the rage, but invitees remember better when they have a paper invitation in their hands. They also need to know where to send a gift if they feel inclined.
*Invite family, friends, and anyone who was instrumental in your child’s life (mentors, tutors, people your child has worked with and for, etc.). This is your chance to thank them, and their chance to celebrate your child’s accomplishments.
*Get a special outfit for your son or daughter. A new pair of slacks or a dress or even a new pair of shoes (because that’s all that shows beneath the formal gown!) are a nice touch.
*Throw an after-graduation reception. Check with your local church about using the reception hall or even have it in your backyard! You can have the traditional cake and punch or choose finger foods and desserts your teen loves. Having a reception gives people a more leisurely chance to congratulate your child.
*Have photos or scrapbooks available that show your child throughout his or her homeschool years.
*If your child is comfortable with it, have them address those attending with a few words of thanks, what it took to graduate, and his or her future plans. This keeps him or her from needing to answer these questions a million times during the reception.
*Have a guestbook, a table for gifts and a basket for cards.
*Choose decorations that reflect your child’s achievement and personality. You don’t have to choose “school colors” so you can really live it up here!
*Remember to send thank you cards. It’s rare these days to even get a thank you for wedding gifts, so your child will really stand out if they send a thank you in the mail.
What did Blake’s Graduation look like?
As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, we chose to do a casual graduation for various reasons. Blake is a very casual person, and he has told me repeatedly that the graduation party he had was very much “him.” That’s a success in my book!
So, here’s what we did…
We chose to celebrate his achievements in the town we consider our “home town” since we have moved so much. All of Blake’s grandparents are near there, so they did not have to travel out of town for the event.
We had it at my mom’s church in the fellowship hall which had a kitchen attached and plenty of room for tables and chairs. Bonus was the nursery nearby!
We bought graduation invitations from Walmart and Blake sent out about 50 to family and friends. I think we had about 30-40 people in attendance.
My mom took Blake shopping at a party supply store for plates, napkins and various graduation decor. He chose a blue theme because that’s his favorite color, and he chose to keep it super simple.
The grandparents and our family divided up the workload of buying food, decorating, and cleaning up. My mom chose to pay for quite a bit of the reception as part of her gift to Blake.
We had a cake and individual ice cream cups. We had shrimp cocktail, bacon-wrapped water chestnuts, deli meat and cheese, caramel corn, and some other things I can’t remember right now. These were things Blake wanted and could easily feed a crowd.
We had a table for food, a table for gifts, a basket for cards and money, but I don’t think we had a guest book. We had scrapbooks from Blake’s childhood out on the tables, which proved to be a hit as people sitting at the tables tried to find themselves in the books. We also had a slide show going at the back of the room with photos from Blake’s school years.
We played a game of Blake Trivia. This was my favorite part! I put together a sheet of trivia that we handed out to people as they came in. It had questions on it with little known facts about Blake, and people tried to guess which answers were correct. I tried not to embarrass him…too much.
Blake spent a lot of time moving from table to table talking to everyone there. He did make a brief announcement at the beginning about his plans and thanked everyone for coming.
All in all, everyone had a good time, and it truly was a celebration of Blake. That’s really what this is all about – a time to celebrate an awesome achievement. If nothing else, mama, this is your moment to breathe and thank the Lord for His provision throughout this journey! You made it! Congratulations!
I’d love to hear from those of you who chose a formal graduation! Leave your experience in the comments section!
HeatherHH says
It’s funny how we’re all different, but this sounds like a formal party to me (just minus a ceremony) with the large number of guests, fancy foods, activities, etc. I went to my high school graduation, because that’s just what you did. But, I had no graduation party, and most people I knew didn’t either. In college, I deliberately avoided the graduation by planning a trip with my husband for that time. He only went to his college and grad school graduation because all the family expected it of him. No graduation parties for either of us. Neither of us grew up in a family background where graduation parties outside of the family were typical.
My oldest is graduating next year. He’s very similar to us. We usually host a Memorial Day gathering for my husband’s parents, grandparents, aunt & uncle, etc. I think that will double as his family graduation celebration, but there won’t be much difference except for maybe snazzing the food up a bit and my husband making a 30-second speech..
Melinda Johnson says
When I graduated from homeschooling, my parents and I put together a worship time with my favorite worship songs since I was part of the worship team throughout high school. Then my dad presented me my diploma and I had to say a speech I had prepared! (My first public speech!) I remember some family being there, but a lot of people from throughout my childhood who had had an influence on me. Then we had cake and such in the fellowship hall as well. Oh, this was all done at our church. I didn’t wear a cap and gown. I LOVED having just a little bit of attention on me, without it being over the top. I received a few presents as well. I’m not sure if we sent out paper invites or not, and this was before Facebook, so we must have done something like that. I graduated in 1999. In indiana, they have a big graduation ceremony at the state house for any homeschooler who wants to do it that way. I’m sure they have to go through a process of proving that they finished the core 40 classes or whatever we call it in this state. My oldest will probably graduate from a small private school, so it will be simple but meaningful. I’m sure the next two in line, if they finish out their schooling at home, will have very quiet ceremonies, if they do have a ceremony. They might just opt for a open house and call it done. The youngest is only 2, so we have many more years before he would graduate. Thanks for the tips! It sounds like it was a perfect day for Blake!
Karin says
Thank you for this post. It is very timely for us as we are preparing to graduate our first child as well. She’s been homeschooled the whole way. We are having fun planning it. I guess we’re somewhere between casual and formal if that’s a thing. Closer to casual though. Ashleigh chose to graduate by herself in our own ceremony. We’re having it in our church’s fellowship hall. We’re going to have round tables and chairs, a food table, a gifts table and guestbook/encouragement book, and tables displaying fun and educational things, awards, and interests of Ashleigh. She’s going to give a speech and wear a cap and gown with tassel. She’s also been awarded some honor cords and medallions. Her dad and I will each say something too and we will pray over her and bless her. I’m thinking of having a time where anyone who would like to can share a few words. Either words of wisdom or encouragement for Ashleigh, or funny stories about her, or sweet words or memories to share, etc. Ashleigh wants it to be relaxing and to have a chance to visit with everyone. She’s also chosen the snacks she’d like to serve, including an ice cream sundae bar in lieu of a cake. I’m hoping to have a slideshow done to play during part of it. I wish I had scrapbooks all completed of her growing up years. But at some point early on, I got overwhelmed and behind on that and never caught up. I love the idea of the trivia game. Could you share more details of this or share the page you handed out so I can get an idea of what you mean? Thanks! We’re so excited to celebrate her and with her. I’ll be so sad in the fall when she goes off to college and lives in the dorms at a small private Christian university about four hours away.
Amy says
We had questions like: What was Blake’s childhood nickname? – and then 4 selections or How many times has Blake been on the front page of a newspaper? – and 4 selections. Hope that helps!
Kasey Flores says
May I ask how did he get an academic scholarship? I would really like to hear how he was able to accomplish this. What did you do to prepare him? What curriculum did you use?
Amy says
We are very eclectic in our approach to homeschooling, and actually quite relaxed. I focus a lot of my children’s passions and I make sure they are well-red. He got his academic scholarships by having a transcript that was very diversified (which set him apart) and a good ACT score. I think the ACT score probably held more weight than anything else. He studied for the ACTs on his own using free online resources.
S.T. says
I wish you would do a post with more details on the scholarship; process. What courses Blake did his high school years, schedule, extracurricular activities. When did he start applying to colleges? Etc… Etc… My oldest son will be a freshman this fall. He will need scholarships to help with his further education or else he’ll have to work really hard to make a college education possible. I know I’d love to know more particulars about how to guide him towards being eligible for financial help. Maybe Blake would be willing to write a post this summer? Thank you!
Lara says
Thanks for sharing this! We have our first graduate next year and we’re already making plans. We’re not part of a homeschool group so we plan to do something privately. What we’re thinking now is a ceremony and reception at our church. Probably no cap and gown but just a nice dress for her. She is majorly into music so music will be our theme. She has won many music awards and has a slew of certificates, trophies and pins so we plan to display those. Maybe ask someone like our pastor to say a few words. Anyway, she is already looking forward to it and planning it out. Will be just her style. Thanks for sharing what worked for your son! It’s great to give these kids a celebration that is a continuation of what their education was: tailored just for them!
Jennifer says
I love how you pointed out that it was a celebration for and about your son. Last year we graduated our first. She had a full page list of what she wanted from the food to the decorations to photo boards and cake and games. This year our son is graduating and he wants it to be super LOW KEY. It’s so fun to celebrate their uniqueness with a unique party just for them. Instead of cake (he hates cake) I’ll be making 15 pumpkin pies for his day.
Amy says
Oh how fun! Now that is unique!
Lisa says
Hi Amy! We are leaving this weekend for our state’s homeschool convention and our oldest child will be graduating at the convention as well. I keep re-reading this post and your post about surviving a homeschool convention. We’ve been to 5 conventions but I’m wondering how I’m going to survive one where we have a child graduating! He will be going to the community college, and then finishing his degree online so he is still staying home, but man, is this ever hard! 🙂 Thank you so much for allowing us to walk alongside of you and your wonderful family throughout these years!