I have avoided this post like the plague.
People email {a lot} asking how I’m doing, when I’ll update, and what I think of the program this far into it.
And I avoid.
Why?
Because I didn’t want to have to tell you I had fallen off the wagon!
What happened?
To begin with…LIFE. I could use my pregnancy and subsequent miscarriage to totally justify all of this in your eyes, but that’s not fair because I fell off long before I found out I was pregnant.
The biggest reason was the amount of brain energy and time it took to do all the exercises that are involved as the Tupler Technique progresses. I felt burned out. And my “all or nothing” mentality told me that if I couldn’t get ALL the exercises in during the day, then I just shouldn’t do ANY of the exercises. Not smart.
So, here I am with a humbling update.
My progress? Not backward, but definitely not forward.
What do I think of the technique this far into it? I am still a wholehearted advocate, but I have also learned something from a dear reader whom I conversed with via email a few months back. She encouraged me to tweak rather than give up. (Disclosure: What I am about to say is NOT endorsed by Julie Tupler or the Tupler Technique in any way, shape, or form.)
Tweak #1: My braces are looking pretty ratty and I’m not fond of the new design (haven’t tried it though). Wearing the brace at night always gave me a horrendous back ache and I wasn’t doing a good job of holding my stomach muscles in when I wore the brace, so I am only using the brace when I do the exercises. Otherwise, I wear a support garment (like you find at your local discount store).
Tweak #2: I am focusing solely on the first 4 weeks worth of exercises. I had wonderful results back in 2007 from just doing those first 4 weeks. For now, I am going to stay there because they feel doable to me.
Tweak #3: Not really a tweak, but one that I wasn’t nearly as good at while wearing the brace. Remembering to hold in my stomach! And that brings me to an epiphany and a warning…
I don’t remember the exact date and time when I stopped holding my stomach in, but I would say it happened sometime shortly after I got married.
I wanted to be pregnant.
I wanted to be pregnant so bad, I quit worrying about holding in a non-pregnant stomach.
And then when I truly was pregnant, I definitely didn’t hold in my stomach.
And then I was pregnant all the time, so what was the sense in holding my stomach in.
And then I ended up with a diastasis recti so severe, I ALWAYS looked pregnant.
And I was mortified.
I wish someone had told me.
So, now I’m telling you…HOLD IN YOUR STOMACH!
It’s not just for debutantes or single women. It’s not just for vanity’s sake. It’s not even because your mom said so.
It’s because DR isn’t something you want to have or want to get worse. I don’t have the medical repercussions many woman experience (bowel issues, hernias, etc), but I do know my pregnancies would be easier if my muscles were not separated so far.
So, there you have it…I fell off the wagon and I’m back on.
I’m going to go back and update all the old posts with new information. I’ll send out new updates here and there. And I’ll continue to offer hope and encouragement from someone who understands!
Jillian says
Oh Amy, how I wish that I hadn’t fallen off either. Now, I’m two months pregnant and wondering if I’ll stall at 9-10 cm for hours like I did last time. I narrowly escaped a c-section. Julie talks about how having a diastasis can affect your ability to push. I know first hand it did with me. I’m all or nothing too, and even contemplated getting the new splint thinking THAT will help me stick to the program better, but I know its not about the type of splint I have. It’s me. I’m glad that you have decided to move forward with the program in a manner that suits you. Maybe I’ll do the same. I pray that God would strengthen your resolve and bless your efforts.
Blessings,
Jill
Nicole says
I am a physical therapist and I can tell you that I have seen women correct their DR after having it for YEARS! So that is great you are going at it again! We are all rooting for you!
Suanna says
Thank you for being honest about your struggles and thoughts.
Rachel says
Thank you for this post. I just gave birth to baby #7 seven weeks ago. I can feel how week my abs are and I have just been searching for ways to heal my diastasis. I also have about 65 lbs to lose and the whole thought is rather daunting right now, but I’m trying to make smart choices one day at a time.
God bless.
Lisa R says
Amy, your honest presentation of your life is an almost-daily encouragement to me, falling off the wagon included.
I was following this series for mild-moderate diastasis recti, but didn’t have the funds to get the DVD or book, so I found exercises on an alignment blog that did help my DR. I’m going to include the link so that your readers will know the difference between “sucking it in” and engaging the transverse abdominals. I always did the first, and as you can read, it has negative effects on your body. The Tupler Technique may cover this, but for those like me who didn’t purchase it, I think this is worthwhile reading.
http://www.alignedandwell.com/?p=1450&option=com_wordpress&Itemid=223
Here’s to getting those muscles back where they belong!
Amy says
Thanks for sharing, Lisa. 🙂
Brandy @ Afterthoughts says
Okay…I have this, and I had NO IDEA there was anything I could do about it! (Other than hide behind my clothes as best as I can, of course.) I found you on Pinterest today, and I am just *thrilled*. Thank you so much for writing about this.
I’m subscribing to your blog in order to read your updates. I would be ever so grateful if you ever posted a photo (even a stock photo) of the support garment you wear so that I can get an idea of the “right” kind. What can I say? I am a bad shopper. 🙂
Amy says
Welcome! And I wanted to post a pic, but couldn’t find one on the internet…sorry. 🙁
jackie says
this happened with me after my 3rd baby… i was just told to do crunches (didn’t work)..there is more i can do?!?!
Amy says
Absolutely! Check out the Diastasis page: https://raisingarrows.net/diastasis-recti-from-a-moms-perspective/
Valerie says
Amy, you’re doing great!! Thanks for the update and I fully support tweaking something instead of demanding perfection or nothing. I’m getting started again after baby #4 arrives in a couple months. It’s a lifestyle. You have so many supporters out there; thanks for your transparency and encouragement! 🙂
Grateful for Grace says
I gave up because I was having shortness of breath while wearing the brace. Could not breath well. I loosened it. I moved it. I tried everything.
So… I stopped doing the exercises and wearing the brace.
BUT I have noticed a difference just in learning how to hold my muscles and do the exercises.
I will start doing the exercises again and will just hold my muscles as best as I can. Fixing a diastasis recti is good. Breathing is better. 😉
Heather Anderson says
Thanks for the update. I have this problem as well and am looking into doing her program. It is good to here input from someone who has, or at least is, walking through it.
Brooke says
For those who can’t afford the program…I found Julie’s book in my local library system! My library is always my first stop for a book that looks interesting. If I like it from the library I can add it to my personal library. 🙂
Amy says
That’s great! I never even considered you might be able to find it there!
Melissa H. says
THANK YOU for posting this! I have a SEVERE diastasis recti and have begun doing the exercises and wearing the brace…um, four or five times. I have started but not been persistent. I have managed to bring a 7-8 finger diastasis down to a 4-5 finger separation…but I stopped there. I don’t know why I stopped–I still look just as pregnant–but I just stopped. I also started a new blog last year where one of my first posts was talking about my diastasis and linked to your blog and your story in the post. I told my readers I’ll be posting before and after pics–so I better get to exercising so I can post them! I’m hopping on your wagon, if you don’t mind, and I’m going to press on!
Lisa O. says
Hi! I was referred to your site from a friend, and it has been really great to read your thoughts on this problem. I’ve been wearing my brace since Thursday night when I received it. I was really excited about the program. My big problem is that this brace is actually really hurting me! I’ve had really bad pains where my back meets my sides, from the brace pushing in. (I do wear a tank under it and watched the video on how to put it on, so I’m quite sure it’s accurate.) And now, my back/side muscles hurt as though I threw out my back muscles on that one side. It really hurts. (Sitting in bed to relax at the end of the night hasn’t been nearly as much fun either.) Anyways, has anyone else ever had this problem? 🙂 -Lisa O.
Amy says
I cannot wear it at night in bed because it does hurt my back terribly. I wonder if you could loosen it just a bit and see if that helps at all. If not, try only splinting during the exercises and really concentrating on holding your muscles in the rest of the time.
Brooke says
I don’t wear mine at night because I feel like I can’t breath! I do wear it for a few hours during the day until the bunching drives me nuts. 😉
Lisa O. says
Thanks for the quick replies, ladies. (I’m a little pokey on the reply.) Yes, I was so excited about this, and really bummed that it wasn’t working for me. Sleeping with it on doesn’t really bother me – it’s during the day… the bunching in my back. I’ve given up on it completely, which means that I haven’t been doing the exercises or anything. When I wear it, I remember to do the things I should – but without it, the day passes by without thinking about it. I need to try though…. Thanks for the support. 🙂
Nicole says
Have any of you heard of the Mutu program? Found them when I was researching my options, and on the edge of going with Tuppler DVD (read the book). I found a comparison posted by a mom who’d done both, and had much better results with Mutu, in terms of being able to move on to other exercise programs again and not just stick with Tuppler routines forever. Mutu does not use a splint at all, and focuses on rebuilding core strength (in a markedly different way from the Tuppler Technique). I don’t personally find their full 12 week fitness program useful b/c they focus on squats and I have joint issues, but the core program is great! Deceptively simple, and SHORT compared to all the Tuppler exercises – despite a small DR, I felt strong and held together (and my stomach looked totally flat).
Stephanie Stonis says
Have you heard of the mutu system? I also have a diastasis recti and I bought the Tupler splint and book, but honestly I could not get the splint to stay put and remembering to do 1000’s of exercises each day wasn’t happening either. I have not tried the mutu system yet, waiting to save the money for it, but it only takes 15 minutes a day–which seems much more doable. Would love to hear your thoughts on it though!
Amy says
I’ve never heard of it. Do you have a link you can send me to? Thanks!
Lisa O. says
I also have been looking into this. Since the splint was hurting so much, I had to stop wearing it. I looked into the MuTu tonight, and am really considering giving it a shot…
http://mutusystem.com/
🙂 -Lisa O.
Donielle @ Naturally Knocked Up says
I’ve always kind of avoided figuring out if I have this…..cause everyone always get a little pooch after kids, right?
Well, 5 months post miscarriage, the weight I gained from 11 weeks of pregnancy and then a month of binge ice cream eating *ahem* and the extra weight has caused me to actually lay down and see if I had one. About 2 fingers worth. I’ve got her book on order so we’ll see what I can do. 🙂
Amy says
I’m having a terrible time getting the weight off post-miscarriages. 🙁 The workout is tough, but worth the effort.
Susanne Reinhold says
Hi, I just came across your page again and thought to check to see if there is an update on your Tupler program. I am a Tupler certified instructor and I feel obliged to clarify that YOU DO NOT WANT TO HOLD IN YOUR TUMMY ALL THE TIME. It might be someting that Julie does not emphasise as much as I would like to. Sucking in the belly is not the same as contracting your core. You want to contract when you do the exercises or when you sneeze or when you give birth or when you lift something or somebody heavy. You don’t want to suck in all the time. It actually causes more harm than good. I tell all my clients to learn to RELAX their belly just as much as to learn how to CONTRACT.
Here is a great article that somebody (who is not a Tupler trainer) wrote on this subject: http://www.alignintegrationandmovement.com/1/archives/03-2012/1.html
Susanne
angie says
I’m so glad I found this website! I have been so discouraged because I have the same problem you do! It has just recently gotten much worse with a recently discovered hernia. I went and saw a plastic surgeon and he said he can fix the hernia and DR at the same time. Is this going to solve my problem I wonder? I don’t like the idea of surgery. I think I may try this program you are advocating and see if it works for me. I am a little worried about how my stomach has suddenly burst out when my third child was born 3 years ago. Good luck to you though and thanks for writing about this!
Vicky says
I can’t tell you how much better this makes me feel. I’ve fallen off somewhat as well, a couple of good days here or there but in general the last couple of months have been a bit rubbish. There is just to much to do in the day and not enough hours…or energy! I didn’t realise I could go back to the beginning and instead just went back to the week I’d messed up, I’m still stuck in week 5 and I’ve been at it for months. Have def seen some results, when I pull my tummy muscles in it goes almost flat, but when I let it out, the bulge returns, albeit smaller than it was at the very beginning. I think after reading this I may go back to the beginning and aim to get the 3 good weeks in before week 4 and continue from there. So glad I’m not the only one this is happening to, I beat myself up for being lazy but sometimes it’s just too hard. I’m going to follow your posts with interest, I really think they will help and inspire me. Thanks. Vicky. London, U.K
Rita says
Just found your site today. I had two pregnancies with large babies, both with extra amniotic fluid (though I never tested positive for GD). The second one was a breech baby weighing 10 lbs., 14.5 ozs.! He’s 9 months old now.
I can put five fingers in my gap right now. I also need to lose about 30 lbs. to get back under my BMI. I want my stomach to move with the rest of my body again, and to not have to guard it when my two-year-old climbs all over me. And to not bump into stuff because I keep forgetting how big I am!
I got Lindsay Brin’s Core Firing Sequence DVD and her Boot Camp DVD recently and plan on trying that program.
Racheal says
Hi I’m new to this blogging thing. But I’ve been struggling with this diastisis recti for years now but didn’t realize what it was till I talked with my sister in law about it and she sent me to your blog. I’ve been reading and studying it and it is exactly what I have. I have 2 boys and I carried them so low I thought people could see there foot out of my vaginal area. I’ve always worked hard to lose my weight after but I always had this pregnant looking belly. As long as I wore my cloths a little high it looked fine because t held it in. Lol then I started selling these crazy body wrap things. And it tightened up my stretched skin but still had the pregnant belly look! I had a miscarriage as well 2 years ago half way through. So I know what your going through. It was my little girl finally. But God had a different plan. So I’ve laid up a little treasure in heaven and I can’t wait to hold her in my arms yet again!
I just ordered my splint and DVD so I’m looking forward to this journey of getting a flat tummy again! Now that I have the wraps to tighten the skin and make it look like I never had babies! And if this really works then I will be back to a tight skinny belly! And I’m looking forward to it! Thank you!!
Hannah says
Hey Rachael! I’m curious about the body wraps you mentioned. Here are my questions… What are they? Do they work? How long do you have to wear it for it to tighten your skin? Did you keep wearing it while you wore your splint? Are they affordable? If so where can I get one?
Hanna says
Thank you for doing this series! I don’t think anyone can understand what DR is like unless they have been through it. I am on day two of the Tupler Technique and it is not easy, I can see how my stamina might wear down after a while! Did you lose all of your progress when you stopped? That is my biggest fear!
Amy says
I got pregnant, so yes, I did lose my progress. After that baby, I chose to work on my overall health and weight loss first. That was more important to me this time around. I am pregnant again, but do plan to get back to it after baby’s birth. There are some other options about there too like Fit2Be and others that you might want to look into to that are not quite as rigorous.
Ashley B. says
Hello Amy,
I realized after my 5th birth that I had DR with about a 3 in gap. I did a few exercises to help but that was it. Now I’m about 32+ weeks along with baby #6 and I’m noticing much more abdominal pain. Did you notice more pain/muscle soreness/aches with your subsequent pregnancies after having DR?
Thanks for your help 🙂
Amy says
There is a lot more “pulling” of my muscles now – yes. 🙁
khadijah says
Hi Mama, have you seen Katie Bowman’s restorative exercises? I wonder how she would support DR….her approach to prolapse is quite different.