This Sunday, I broke down in church. We are studying Lamentations Chapter 3, and I could identify all too well. (Read it – pretty weighty stuff.)
As I pull out of the first trimester, I find myself longing for normalcy, but knowing I’m just not there yet. I avoid Pinterest because it is full of food. I avoid my own kitchen because it is full of food. I can’t talk about certain foods and I can’t shop in certain areas of the grocery store.
Food is both my nemesis and my crutch.
As I said in an earlier update, nibbling all day long keeps the nausea at bay. In fact, before I go to bed at night, I grab a quick bite, turn on the fan, lay down, turn on some music, and go to sleep. All these things together make for a fairly restful night. (Some of my favorite sleeping music is David Nevue and Enya – if you order the CDs from Amazon, you get a FREE MP3 version as well so you can play them from your computer or other devices.)
I am trying really hard to be more peaceful about where I am in this pregnancy. One thing our pastor mentioned in his teachings from Sunday was that as Christians, we know our suffering is not forever. As a pregnant woman, I know I won’t feel like this forever. There will come a day when food will not be my nemesis. There will come a day when I will feel good enough to do all the things I haven’t been able to do over the past few months. Every day, I get stronger. Every day, I am one step closer. And I am thankful.
Ginny says
Hugs! I can relate so well. With my most recent sixth pregnancy, I avoided pinterest and facebook to avoid all the food pictures. That was a new experience compared to my other pregnancies. Hope you can enjoy food again soon!
Kirsten Pankratz says
Wow, that’s exactly where I was a few months ago. I just swore up and down that this has to be my last. I just can’t keep going through this terrible sick stuff with migraines to boot! I really didn’t know if I’d ever feel better again as it was lasting and lasting with this pregnancy but now at 22 weeks I am feel well and am so busy with “life” that I sometimes forget I’m pregnant until I feel the happy little kicks in my stomach. It’ll get better. You just have to hang onto that truth while your feeling so terrible. And remember, the Lord is refining you as you suffer. I’m not a very good sick person, myself. I just beg God to make be better-NOW! Hang in there, Amy. A beautiful baby is growing within you. 🙂
Amy says
Isn’t it amazing how quickly we can “forget” 😉
Melissa says
My pregnancies were like yours, but I had an aversion to many foods throughout the entire pregnancy. I know how difficult it can be. Even though you know this stage won’t last forever and you’ll have a beautiful baby at the end of it all, going through it is still difficult. Sending prayers for peace for you.
Serenity says
Wow!!! This brings back memories of how pregnancy can completely level our emotions, bodies and relationship with God. I know I have never felt as vulnerable as when pregnant. I’ll be praying that the worst is over and you feel more like yourself each day 🙂
shantzfamily says
Wow. I know how you feel. I despised food- smell, look, thought- you name it. And yet had to nibble all day as well to keep things under control (and unfortunately I had to take meds for most too- or else I threw up even water)
I was also concerned I would never feel “normal” again during pregnancy. And I threw up for the entire pregnancy for a few of them. But regardless, you can still have peace- you’re right!
(but even knowing that the suffering is only temporary- it’s still tough to see the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes!)
I couldn’t figure out how I could gain a bunch of weight while despising food- I guess all that nibbling adds up 🙂
Each time I didn’t think I could do it again. And yet I’ve made it 6 times. Praise the Lord- He truly can carry you through anything. (and you get a beautiful baby at the end!)
Amy says
Amen!
Rachel says
I’m curious, why was the study only on chapter 3?
Amy says
That’s where we were in the book last Sunday. 😉
MelissaJoy says
Oh, Amy I am praying for you! I have visited your blog semi-regularly for a long time, and what a blessing this new baby is! I know you are so thankful in the midst of the trial, but it is still very much a trial (the sickness).
I have to say, that I have never gotten sick to the point of losing my lunch in any of my pregnancies (I am 16 weeks pregnant with number 4, so right along with you!). I know that probably sounds like no help to you, but I’m not someone who takes it for granted AT ALL! Nearly every person I know gets terribly sick during pregnancy and so many have had such harder physical trials than I have, and I lift you ALL up in prayer! I really do feel for you.
You may have tried or heard about this, but I know a number of ladies have benefitted from taking extra vitamin b6. It helps the stomach produce more hydrochloric acid, which naturally gets diminished in pregnancy (so I read), therefore making digestion easier and calming nausea. It was night and day for one friend in her third pregnancy. I hope that can be helpful to you! Either way, I will pray for you all this week.
Congratulations!
Amy says
Thank you, Melissa! And yes, I am taking a B Complex and it is helping. 🙂
Patti says
That scripture passage was exactly what I needed to hear tonight. Thank you so much of posting. I will keep you (and baby) in my prayers.
whitney says
awe bless your heart! I know your struggle! i just found out that I have an allergy to soy and as i said a few weeks ago I am also in the first trimester of my fifth pregnancy. I feel that this recent allergen discovery is a major key in being healthy for this pregnancy and not being heavily burdened by high blood pressure, gestational diabetes and ridiculous weight gain. Since I have discovered this allergy I have actually lost about forty pounds. But it is a MAJOR struggle to find things to eat when I am busy. walking through walmart is a challenge as even a loaf of bread is a “no-no” for me. :/ Hang in there Amy! There is a light at the end of that tunnel! <3