Jamerrill Stewart from Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling guest posts today on the quandary of a working mother who wants to homeschool her children, but can’t see a way out of her career. I pray this blesses and encourages my readers who have found themselves in similar circumstances. Thank you, Jamerrill for sharing your heart!
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Countless times I have had mothers say to me,
€œI wish I could homeschool, but I have to work.”
I worked full-time, 36-40 hrs every weekend as a Charge Nurse, for the first three years of our homeschooling journey. Slowly, the Lord showed me that it was costing my family too much, in more ways than just financial, for me to continue working outside of our home. {You can read more about my journey in my current series, Choosing Home}
I am in no way condemning any woman in any situation. We all have life circumstances in which the Lord must walk us through. You may already be creatively working outside the home and homeschooling. On the other hand, you may be researching homeschooling and wondering how you could ever be home with your children. My heart is to offer bits of my journey to you as hope that the Lord is still in the business of giving us the desires of our heart.
Here are a few reminders that may bless you on your journey as you seek the Lord as to what is His will for your family.
* Believe God – If you have the desire on your heart to homeschool, but are unable to at this point, take that desire and offer it back to God. Many times, He prepares us for what He has called us to do during these waiting seasons.
* Talk to your spouse – The Lord first put the desire on my heart to homeschool while I was reading the book €œBringing up Boys€ by Dr. James Dobson. Our oldest child was barely two years old. I had taken the leap of faith to quit my job in the I.T. industry to stay home with our sweet boy until he started school. I felt conflicted knowing that I never wanted to leave him, but one day I€™d have to give him away to the school system. One evening I mentioned to my husband a crazy idea I read about called homeschooling. To my surprise, my husband replied, €œWell, of course that€™s what we€™re going to do!€ Your spouse may agree that homeschooling is a goal for your family. Then again, your spouse may not agree. Take this to prayer as well and release it to the Lord. If it is His will for you to homeschool, he will confirm it in the heart of your spouse. This may take time, but He is faithful.
* Consider the cost – Many moms spend a huge chunk of their paychecks on childcare, after-school and summer programs, wardrobe, lunches, and gas. Not to mention vehicles, vacations and credit cards. If you look at your budget and don€™t see how it€™s possible for you to leave the workforce, prayerfully ask the Lord to expose ways that your family can save money and cut back. For a season consider cutting out all extras like sports, music lessons, eating out, movies, extra shopping, you get the idea. Consider cutting your lifestyle back to simply the essentials. { Here are some of the things I gave up to be a SAHM} Believe me, I€™ve gained far more than the earthly items I€™ve sacrificed. Dave Ramsey, who my husband is a big fan of, says, €œLive like no one else, so you can live like no one else.€
* Baby Steps – While the Lord has led me to stay home full-time, it was a slow and steady process to get to this point. Carefully, he led me to step down from full-time to part-time hours, then part-time to PRN-then PRN to home free! Sure, we didn€™t know how we were going to make it on just one income. My husband even had a five-month season of unemployment where God provided for us supernaturally. The point is for me it has been a faith walk. The Lord has honored our decision by helping us cut expenses, pay off debt and learn to trust Him fully.
*Wait well – My friend, I know that is easier said than done. You know the biggest component in your waiting season.
Waiting.
{Ouch!}
Gods Word promises that He will never leave us nor forsake us {Deuteronomy 31:6}. Trust that as you continue to delight yourself in Him, that He will give you the desires of your heart {Psalms 37:4}. Trust that these desires in your heart are from the Lord. Believe that He will bring all these good things to pass. He€™ll put you right where He needs you to be.
Has the Lord brought you home from working full-time? Do you have an encouraging testimony you€™d like to share?
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Jamerrill Stewart loves Jesus fiercely. She and her husband Travis have been married for 13 years, and are the blessed parents of 5 children ages 11, 8, 5, 2 & infant. Jamerrill writes about homeschooling on-the-cheap, frugal/large family living and all things Jesus at Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling.
top photo credit:Kheel Center, Cornell Univ
Kathleen says
I LOVE this post — it’s like you did this just for me — even though you don’t know me 🙂
I have been struggling with my current circumstances of having to work FT (at my husband’s request) and balancing my most important jobs of wife and mom to four precious blessings.
For the past couple of years, it has really been pressing on my heart that I need to be home with my children and remove my older ones from the public school system. Right now, my husband is not in the same place as I am on these issues, but I PRAY everyday for the Lord’s will to be done in our lives.
I am really learning a lot about patience and persistence while I am still in these circumstances. God is so good and He knows what He’s doing, but some days I could really use the encouragement of other mamas who’ve been in a similar situation. Thank you! This post is a balm to my aching heart!
Heather says
This is such a timely post! I have been offered some freelance work that would require a certain number of hours per week, and I have been debating whether or not it would actually be beneficial. This really helps me look at all of the important aspects of it! Thanks!
Amy says
“The Lord first put the desire on my heart to homeschool while I was reading the book “Bringing up Boys†by Dr. James Dobson. Our oldest child was barely two years old.”
This is exactly what happened to me! My oldest was 2 when it happened. My husband was so excited. I wasn’t wanting to homeschool at the time but God changed my heart.
Jennifer says
My story is similar as well except when a weekend charge nurse, I wasn’t homeschooling but was very tired. My kids were involved in everything. I went all the way down too and now have been off since october, homeschooling since september.
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
Praise God, that is awesome Jennifer!
Tabatha says
What a great post! I have been a SAHM for over 2.5 years now and what a journey its been. When I was working after I had my first son I so missed being at home and I HATED going to work all the time. I felt like I was missing out- I even flipped out on my family one time over missing my son’s first Easter egg hunt! Then I had my second son and the feelings of working became worse. I dropped down to part time hours and boy did we ever struggle financially and I thought, “man, is this what I’m suppose to be doing?” Then I decided to change jobs because I would make more money being PRN then I was part time and the hours were guaranteed every week. So I started my new job and we moved into a cheaper apartment. When my son was 18 months old my husband brought him to where I was working because he was screaming for mommy. That’s when I said I’m done, I need to find a way to stay home full time. A few months later I was still working PRN and then around Christmas I just stopped getting hours. They kept telling me that there were no hours to be had to call back next week. So I did. After a month of that my husband and I realized we didn’t need that income as much as we thought. In January of 2009 I became a full time stay at home mom and it was all in His timing!
Amy says
What a wonderful testimony!
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
Kathleen, you blessed me so much by being so transparent and honest. I’m sure God had you and others in mind when He laid it on my heart to write this post. He knows exactly where you are and He sees your heart. Let me say, you’re doing what God requires–submitting to your husband and trusting Him. He will make a way!
Ladies, isn’t it wonderful when the Lord works the same thing in our hearts?
Laura Lou says
Maybe ONE woman might find encouragement in my [shortly put] story:
I’m a newish single mother of four children. I have sole physical custody, and I homeschool and work too. God gave me the desire long ago to homeschool when I was still married and at-home. Although this newish road has had its challenges, there isn’t any better place for my children than at my feet, even as I type this short note during my break from work. GOD PROVIDES and indeed. And through the challenges we’ve faced, we’ve been sharpened and changed for His glory! TRUST HIM, especially with those most precious to you. He is worthy.
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
Laura, that is amazing! You are such an encouragement 🙂
Katie says
Laura and Jenny B,
Laura I am in the same boat as you… I have been divorced for nearly 2 years and am homeschooling my children as well. I run a home daycare in order to provide for my children and I recommend to Jenny that if you need to have additional income with your background this would be an excellent avenue for you to explore. It’s not the easiest thing to do, but I love all my children, whether they be daycare kids or the ones the I personally birthed, and as long as God keeps me as a single mother I will provide for my children and homeschool them as he shows me how.
JennyB says
This is wonderful. I needed this so much! I have been feeling the pull to homeschool for a few months now, and I am a full time public school teacher. We have an excellent public school system where we live, but the social aspects of school are not going well for my children. My oldest is 14 and will be in 9th grade. She is very rebellious and has gotten into a bad crowd of friends that encourage things I avidly want to keep my children from. I feel like I “have no choice” because of having to work. I desperately want to get her away from those influences. She also struggles academically, but not for lack of smarts. It’s just laziness. I think I could help her get where she needs to be, even if we had to go back a couple of grades to do it. I just have no idea how to do it with having to work. I have mentioned it casually to my husband (who is my children’s step-dad) and he didn’t nix it or encourage it, either way. I just don’t know what to do! I’ve talked to a couple of friends who homeschool and they were very excited and willing to share with me everything they know. I also have two other children, 12 and 9. The 12 y.o. will be in 7th grade, and she is a straight A student. I feel like I could challenge her and help her excel even more than she already does. The 9 y.o. will be in 4th grade and he has ADHD. He has trouble staying focused and being quiet in class. Some teachers have handled him fine and others have been completely exasperated and hardly gave him the time of day. Sorry so long! As you can see, I have a dilemma here. Really don’t see how we can make it without my income….but would love to be able to homeschool!
Amy says
I will be spending time in prayer for you tonight, Jenny! Homeschooling your children is such a wonderful blessing and I’m not sure anyone is able to see a way to do it all when they first start, but somehow God just keeps blessing as we go. I’m so glad you were blessed by Jamerrill’s guest post!
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
Jenny, I’m praying for you too! What I can offer you is this, no matter the sacrifice, you will never regret these sweet years of pouring into your children. For a long time, even though I was already homeschooling, I didn’t see how I could ever *not* work. God has been faithful to continuously provide for us and honor my husband’s decision to bring me home full-time. Blessings sister as you pray on these things!
Sara says
My husband’s father left while his mother was pregnant with their fourth child. She home schooled all four children K-12 while working a full time job. When they were very little a single aunt would stay with them but as my husband (the oldest) and his younger sister got older it became his job to watch them all day long. This was back in the 80’s and no way could you do that now and probably wasn’t a good idea back then either! But God was faithful! All four children love and serve the Lord, and three have college degrees!!! It wasn’t an ideal situation and it wasn’t a traditional home school situation (my husband actually started working at the age of 10 for men in their church to supplement the family income) but my mother in law says that the only way it worked because she prayed constantly for her children.
Amanda says
Did you write this for me? It sure seemed like it. My husband and I desperately want to homeschool. I have been a public school teacher for ten years, and our son will be starting Pre-K there this year (even though we have worked with him extensively at home). I hate to think of my child going into the public school system. Two years ago my husband lost his job as an intern architect and has gone back to school to get his engineering degree (more job stability). The Lord has really convicted us that homeschooling is the best thing for our children. My heart is breaking as I prepare to go back to work in a couple of weeks. We also have a one year old and a baby due in December. (I should also add that we are trusting the Lord with the size of our family.)That being said, we know I NEED to be home and SHOULD be home, but we are left with a great deal of debt. We have been on one income since he lost his job and went back to school, and it simply isn’t enough. We are juggling bills. I make approximately what he will make when he finishes his degree. Our tentative plan is for me to work one more year to pay off the bulk of our debt with our combined income…but we both want me home. What do you advise for people who are struggling with debt? We had stopped using our credit cars prior to his lay-off, and (Praise the Lord) during this difficult time we have NOT accumulated anymore! I keep giving this over to the Lord in prayer, but I would love to hear your thoughts.
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
Amanda,
It sounds like you and your husband are on the same page and working towards the ultimate goal of you being home full-time. “Agreement,” is a huge piece of the puzzle for your family. 🙂 My husband has been working the Dave Ramsey “8 step plan.†You can listen to Dave free online. Also, his book “The Total Money Makeover†is full of inspiring stories of families on small incomes getting out of debt.
Isn’t wonderful that we can all teach our children something different?
Julia says
I hate to be the dissenter, but, I am struggling w/finding blog posts and personal narratives of mamas who continued to work outside of the home while homeschooling. I (and others) need practical advice on how to this. There are some of us who are not being called home….not matter how much we pray. Does anyone have any ideas?
Amy says
I don’t know of any off hand; although I do know people who have managed to do this. I’ll ask the question on my facebook page. 🙂
Rebecca says
My first job is at home with my children. And I have been homeschooling my first child for 2 years now. I also have an almost 3 year old, a one year old, the fourth child is due at the end of the year. I do work part time (24 hours) nights as an ICU RN on Fridays and Saturdays, every weekend. I always say this is my second (and less important job) We do this not as much for my income as for the insurance. My husband’s job does not offer insurance benefits. The biggest thing for us is to stay in unity over this. While I desire to not work at all, I understand that this is what I am to do right now. My husband tries to help support me in any way that he can. He works all week. The biggest sacrifice is that we have to work hard to all be together. We give up a lot of extra activities and “good” things that we could do outside of our home. I know that God will give me strength and wisdom to do this. He called me to homeschool. I believe in his ability to help me every day. Sometimes I am very tired and that leads me to mess up things as a mom. But I know that God uses all circumstances to grow me, he forgives me and he protects my children too. I keep my eyes on God and the goal, believing he sees me and knows my circumstances and will work on my family as he see fit.
Jamerrill @ Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling says
I understand Rebecca, and I want to encourage you to believe God right where you find yourself. God knows your circumstances and your heart. 🙂 Jamerrill