On July 4, 2007, Emily Sofia entered this world weighing 10 pounds, 2 ounces. A beautiful bundle of baby girl. Our 5th child.
The photo above was taken the day we brought her home. We’re both in our “going-home” outfits. I could not get over just how beautiful she was.
She was a traveling baby. By the time she was 3 months old, she had been in 6 states. This is us enjoying a snack in South Dakota.
I’m a “baby-wearing” mama so Emily was never very far from my heart.
And then one day, my usually happy-go-lucky quiet baby girl, got fussy. For several days she just fussed off and on. Then, she started vomiting yellow. We took her to the ER. The next morning, she was whisked off to surgery. During the surgery, they discovered she had been born w/ a congenital defect called malrotation of her intestines. At some point, her intestines had twisted. They were black. 2 days later they went back in, resected 1/3 of her bowels, and we spent the next week in PICU. A terrible yeast infection in her blood stream kept us in the hospital for 3 weeks, but we brought her home on Christmas Eve to celebrate. She was fussy, but we were so happy to have her home!
But, 2 weeks later, we were back in the hospital. She was still throwing up yellow. 5 more cm of bowel were resected and in only 6 days we were home! But, Emmy was tiny. She weighed at 7 months what she had weighed at 7 weeks.
But, still she was beautiful. When fully clothed, no one could see how very tiny she was. We tried everything we could think of to help her gain weight, but the weight just would not come on her.
But, the doctors were not concerned because her hair looked good, her nails were growing, she was nursing well. And she was still beautiful.
And then one day, she was gone.
The child my husband had placed in my arms 7 months and 6 days earlier, I now had to place in a stranger’s arms. I had to walk away from her and begin a life that did not include caring for Emily.
So, the 4th of July approaches bittersweetly.