We are a culture that appreciates choices.
We want choices. We crave choices. We stamp our feet in indignation if we don’t get choices.
But, do we have too many choices? Is that even possible?
As a homemaker and homeschooler, I can confidently say
YES
But wait, it isn’t that easy. Choices are a mixed bag…some good, some bad, and not always do they present themselves as one or the other.
I remember the days before thick homeschooling catalogs and homeschool conferences with packed vendor halls. I was blissfully ignorant of how many choices there were out there for homeschooling my children and it was easier to decide what to use. Yet, since becoming aware of these things, I have found some really great resources I wouldn’t have found otherwise.
And I remember the days of homemaking without the internet and with the notion there was only one way to do everything and someone had forgotten to tell me what that one way was. I felt hopelessly lost until I realized the world wide web held tremendous potential for revolutionizing the way I was doing things because there wasn’t one right way to manage my home! What a blessing!
So, if the potential for too many choices is out there, yet the plethora of choices has been known to be helpful to us as wives, homemakers and homeschoolers, then what are we to do?
We must realize sometimes God puts things out of our reach.
I may want to follow every bunny trail, click on every link, read every book, buy every curriculum, and listen to every homeschool speaker out there.
But I can’t.
And that is why God, in His infinite wisdom and mercy, has put restraints on me.
Typically, we don’t think of restraints as a good thing, but they are. They are boundaries, guidelines, rules if you will. They are a rod and staff to our foolish waywardness.
I am a Christian homeschooling mother of many. That, in and of itself, creates boundaries and guards against grabbing at every choice there is out there.
Yes, sometimes I lose my focus and start to stray from the path God has set me on, but He brings me ’round with His rod and His staff…
and I am comforted
for when I am following and focused, choices do not consume me because I have the freedom to say
No.
No to the things that do not encourage me on my path.
No to the things that do not line up with God’s plan for our family.
No to the opportunities that would hinder my job as homeschooler and homemaker.
What have you said no to lately?
jillian says
I have a tendency to start numerous things all at the same time, but then I remember that God has called me to love and nurture my family first. I have to remember that I’m in a season in my life where I must focus on my husband and children. God often saves us from ourselves, doesn’t He? All those good “opportunities” will have to wait. : )
Blessings,
Jill
Tiana @ God Made, Home Grown says
I needed to read this tonight. I am perpetually trying to do too much. I’ve made some progress toward simplifying…and then I give all my margin away with the next creative project I take on. Sigh. Time for bed. Really.
Ginger says
Amen and amen! I say no to gobs of opportunities. I say no to most field trips and I’m grateful for that. Going to the symphony for kids is a big priority for our family, but that’s about it. Because we are a big family, sports and dance lessons and such are not a temptation. The time alone– I can’t afford it. I learned early on not to look at every option out there. When we decided to adopt, we didn’t look into every country as an option. I get overwhelmed thinking about how many millions of orphans there actually are. We got Math U See and have stuck with it. I’m sure everybody could sell me on their math curriculum (except Saxon – yuck!), but we love Math U See and it’s working, so why look into all the other options? Cost allows us to say no to lots of things that would distract us – there’s way too many great things out there. I’ve had to learn to say no to the great, in order to stay focused only on the excellent.
danielle says
I’ll never forget stepping into BJs again after having living in Tanzania, East Africa (we played missionary for a couple years) for so long. I completely shut down! I think we may have left with NOTHING because there were TOO MANY choices! I’m still easily overwhelmed with too many options whether is comes to meal-planning or curriculum choosing. I always love your honesty…and this post really resonates too!
…danielle
Amy says
We are blessed in so many ways, but it can be absolutely overwhelming!
Rhoda says
Thank you for your post and perspective. All too true. I find that my biggest area of temptation for choices is the internet. There are SOOOOOO many good blogs out there today. But I have also learned to say NO to most of them. (It took a while!) I have a few that I follow (yours included) that encourage, exhort, and sometimes, give me the kick in the pants that I need. Thank you for doing so.
Amy says
Thank you so much for including me in your list! The blogs I really want to read on a regular basis come to my inbox, the others that I occasionally read go to my reader. It feels more manageable that way. And yes, I agree…the internet has created so many choices it is mind-boggling!
Joyce says
Yes, we do have alot of choices, but not in everything. For instance our choices are limited for our telephone service, yet in other areas such as curriculum, activities and blogs we can become overwhelmed. My youngest becomes overwhelmed with choices and will stand looking at all the options as seeks the right ice cream item. For me I have to continually remind myself that when I am faced with choices and do not know what to chose I have to go to God. His love and wisdom guides me to make the choices I need to make. Sometimes He just steps in and shuts the option down which I am thankful for. Thanks for posting this I need it today, it made me remember were I need to go as I sit pondering an activity decision.
Ann Finch says
Oh, this struck home for me in so many ways! I am a veteran 18-year-homeschooling mom. In the beginning, lo, those many years ago, there were only a few choices for curriculum! Since we could afford only one or two of them, it was simple! Now, with our 11 year old daughter, the choices are as varied and unlimited as the sky!!!
We have had several serious health issues in our family these past three years, and so even though we are making what should be a nice income, and have only 1 child left in homeschool, our resources are terribly limited this year. I wanted to do my favorite curriculum of all time, but that would have been upwards of 2000 dollars. So guess what??? I am buying NOTHING this year. Not. One. Thing. I am using all my old books, of which there are plenty, the leftover materials from last year, the library, the internet, etc., and I am spending, hopefully, not one dime. Because we can’t afford to. Because it’s ridiculous to use new resources when I have so many already available from years of homeschooling!!!
So THAT is what I have said no to recently. And while it was disappointing–it was also freeing. I know God will bless this year, whether I have a nifty-keen new curriculum or whether I’m using library books. 🙂
Preschool Mom says
A homeschool meet up group that has attendance requirements. They sent out a lot of e-mails and had a hopping message board. It just wasn’t right for me right now.
Karla says
I’m getting overwhelmed with all the educational resources out there, and how I’ll need to report to my school district. *sigh*
Mandy says
Love this!
Melissa says
I’m dealing with this right now too! Heading into our first year homeschooling, there are so many choices for curriculum that it blew my mind! I had to make some choices and accept that it will be ok if some of them don’t work out. It’s so tempting to believe that because the kids will be learning at home we’ll have more time for the extra-curricular activities they are interested in. Right now, I am trying to find the balance which will allow them to follow their interests and encourage a love of learning without making our family feel over scheduled.
Amy says
Adding in extra things can feel very overwhelming. I would encourage you to try to find ways to incorporate their interests into your actual academics. Have you read my post on how we choose extra curricular activities for our children? That might help some! https://raisingarrows.net/2011/01/family-first-activities/
Melissa says
Thanks, Amy! I hadn’t read that post, so I took a minute to read it. Those are very good conditions when considering activities. One of the activities we are planning for this year is 4H ( I dont know if you have that there in the states as well?) What I like is that all ages meet together, so all my kids can be included without multiple nights away from home. It has so many different subject areas, and if there isn’t one you like, you can create a program to follow. Children need to give oral presentations on what they are learning and keep a record book of their projects. Their motto is ” Learn to do by doing”. It really fits in with a homeschooling family, and with our tendency towards Charlotte Mason. Plus as they get older, it can even count as high school credits! We’re hoping to try it this year, so our daughter who is love with horses can basically use it as a unit study, and our son who loves the outdoors can use it as a unit study on that. I’m looking forward to exploring this program more.
Amy says
I was in 4H as a child. Definitely a great family friendly program. It is very rigorous, but a well-done program will reap great rewards for a homeschooling family. Good choice!
Kathy says
This was a great one for me today. I get so easily overwhelmed with choices…I feel the need to thoroughly investigate each one and decide from there the perfect route. I love the perspective that God can and does help us weed out some of the choices through His restraint and that we don’t have to worry about missing out on something because if He didn’t want that choice for us, it obviously wasn’t the best.
Thanks!