Last Wednesday, I had my 14 week OB appointment. My doctor spent some time checking my diastasis and talking to us about how to fix it and when. We have a lot to think over and pray about there, but it seems that exercises alone are not going to fix it. She feels it is a full on hernia and will require a general surgeon and a plastic surgeon to fix it properly. This really isn’t a huge surprise to us. We’ve known for a while that the split in my stomach muscles were extreme compared to what most women have. Ideally, I will need to be finished having children and give myself enough time postpartum to lose the weight I’d like to and not need to lift a baby during the time I am healing. So, the surgery could be quite a way off, but at least we have a plan of attack when that time comes.
A little bit about diastasis and pregnancy, for those of you who have not followed my story over the years. For the most part, it isn’t dangerous to pregnancy. I end up looking due around 15-20 weeks and from there, my belly stretches even more as my uterus tips outward. There are no muscles to stop my uterus from tipping frontward. Baby either ends up with its head toward my back and its bum sticking way out or baby floats and turns breech because of the amount of room it has to move around without the hinderance of stomach muscles. Herein lies the most major pregnancy complication associated with diastasis.
Several of my babies have been transverse breech and needed to be turned. My last two have been head down, but Creed had to be pushed into place at the very end. Pushing the baby into place basically involves two people on either side of me tipping my uterus (and baby) so that baby’s head slips into the birth canal and I can push. Some OBs would not understand this and would be likely to call a c-section rather than work to get baby where he or she needed to be. Thankfully, I have an OB who isn’t quick to operate.
In other news, Ty and I attended the final Teach Them Diligently Homeschool Convention of 2014 in Dallas. We had so much fun and met so many people! The photo above is Sarah of My Joy-Filled Life (another large family mom blogger) and me after one of my sessions. All the sessions went well, and I can only attribute that to the fact that I could not have done any of it without the Lord guiding my words. What a blessing!
This week on July 4th marks Emily’s 7th birthday. As usual, we’ll do sparklers at her gravesite to celebrate. Every year, it seems unbelievable that another year has gone by. Here is a photo of Megan (our now 13 year old) and Emmy to give you an idea of just how much time has passed.
As I’m sure you know, another girl would be quite welcome in this family. Even my boys are ready for another girl! When #7 was born and became the second little boy in a row following Emily’s death, I was devastated. It feels awful to say that – especially considering that little boy is a sheer delight – but, it was the truth. When #8 turned out to be another little boy, I was okay with that. But, here I sit again, really longing for another girl, and wondering if that will ever happen again.
There is no replacement for Emmy. This isn’t really about Emily as much as it is about all the things I store in my basement in the hopes that someday there will be another girl to wear the clothes Emily wore as well as the clothes she never grew into that I continue to hang onto. It’s about the pink and purple and frills that come with having a little girl. It’s about the hair to fix and the little extras that come with having a baby girl that I’ve nearly forgotten.
And so we pray, knowing the Lord has His perfect plan for our family – girl baby or not.