I am one of those people who loves to learn new things. I see some crafty thing at a store or in a magazine and I immediately think, “I should try that!” If I tried to learn every new thing I think would be fun to learn, I would be busy 24 hours a day for the next 7 years.
Several years ago I had a friend who could frost a mean birthday cake. Somewhere in my quest to know all things crafty, I thought it was something I should try. I quickly realized it was much more profitable to patronize my local supermarket than to spend all day decorating a cake that had no chance of turning out looking like something edible, let alone something festive.
It was then I discovered I did not HAVE to be good at everything in order to be a good homemaker, wife, and mother.
This is a difficult lesson for many of us. We live in a day and age when so much information is right at our fingertips. We peruse Pinterest and Instagram, or open the latest homeschooling magazine, or watch the newest baking show on Food Network, and we somehow think everything there is necessary to our day.
We believe we must know how to knit and crochet exquisitely, bake perfect pies and whole wheat bread, sew our own clothes, raise goats and chickens for market, reupholster the couch, paint a landscape, build triple bunk beds, throw pottery, tend a vegetable garden, tile a floor, change the oil in the van, play praise hymns on the guitar, and refinish the dining room table before we will ever be worthy of the title of homemaker.
We believe that until then, we just aren’t quite good enough.
We live our lives in Someday Mode.
Someday, I’ll know…
Someday, I’ll do…
Someday, I’ll be…
We think we have nothing to offer because we haven’t mastered all there is to master in the homemaking realm. We live our lives as Jill of All Trades, Master of None…just skimming the surface and always feeling inadequate.
We hope someday when we are all grown up, we will be able to be the women mentioned in Titus 2, but somewhere deep down inside of us, we’re scared we won’t ever measure up. We won’t ever be mature enough to be a Titus 2 woman.
That simply isn’t true.
Being the younger of the Titus 2 women doesn’t mean we live in ignorance simply because we’ve not parented anyone older than 4, just as being the older of the Titus 2 women doesn’t mean we suddenly know it all the moment we’re sportin’ grey hairs.
Being a Titus 2 woman means as we learn, we share.
It naturally follows that an older woman will have learned more in her years as a wife and mother than a young woman, but it does not mean there is some magical age when we suddenly cross over from young to old, from nothing to offer to everything to offer.
2 Corinthians 1:4 tells us that our trials should equip us to comfort others in the same way we have been comforted by the Lord. Our experiences in the body of Christ are all different. We have been comforted in many different ways and through many different circumstances. We have learned different things and now have different skills.
We share what we’ve learned as we learn what others share.
In this way being a Titus 2 woman is not about age, but about experience.
God expects us to use our experiences to edify and comfort others. This is the essence of Titus 2…passing on what the Lord has taught us in a very purposeful manner.
So what if I don’t know everything about everything.
I probably don’t know everything about ANYTHING because I could always learn more!
But, just as Titus 2 women are teachers, Titus 2 women are TEACHABLE.
There will always be areas where I could use some learnin’, but I had better know how to keep my ears open and my mouth shut during those times. And I might even have to work hard and root out some rather difficult behaviors in my life in order to implement the wisdom shared with me. Refining takes fire and fire is only pleasant when viewed from a distance.
So, this is my encouragement to you…
1. Don’t hide the wisdom the Lord has cultivated in your life because you think you are too young to be a bona fide older Titus 2 woman.
2. Be teachable no matter your age!
3. Seek opportunities to edify and be edified by other women who strive to be godly wives and homemakers. (don’t forget those young women who share your home!)
4. Embrace your strengths and admit your weaknesses. Be satisfied with the skills the Lord has blessed you with and rejoice over the abilities He has blessed others with.
and
5. May the Lord ALWAYS be glorified by what you say and do!
A Titus 2 woman is not someone we will be someday. She is who we strive to be everyday no matter if we are young or old or somewhere in between. Teach and be taught, lead and be lead, love and laugh and grow. Be a Titus 2 woman!
Looking for more peace in your home? Check out my ebook – Creating a Peaceful Home
Originally published on August 7, 2009. Updated on April 26, 2022.
The Clark Clan! says
I printed your blog entry out so I can read it over and over again. You just spoke my heart and it was so beautifully written. Last night I was feeling so weary of everything and was even feeling sorry for myself. What you said about refinement is so true. It is so hard to walk through it. I am inspired because I know I am not alone.
Anonymous says
Thanks Amy. This kind of puts some things into perspective for me today. I’m really struggling with some really tough issues concerning this very thing right right now. Trying so hard to find come semblance of normal in our not so normal life right now, and I feel as if I’m falling very short. I know my weaknesses, and am having to really search for my strenghts. I am going through the fire, and you are so right, I would MUCH rather view it from a distance. Please pray for us as the next few weeks I think will be the hardest on me and the kids and Jeff. This is that time when everyone who has come to help returns to their own lives, and we have to learn how to make it everyday, not alone, but by ourself. I will have to work hard, and root out some of those difficult behaviors. Thank you for the encouragement that I so desperately needed today. Also this is a reminder that no matter what our age, we can teach and be taught whether the teacher is younger or older. Have a good day!
Stephanie
lambechops says
Brilliant post Amy. Thought provoking as usual! Thank you.
Fruitful Harvest says
I love this post!
I had to laugh at the refinish the dining table part….I took mine dining table out to the patio for my sisters bridal shower and thought I would refinish it before moving it back into the house! Its still outside! I bought the liquid sandpaper and stuff to do the job about 3 months ago…..but thats ok! (hee hee)
I wanted to tell you that every time someone asks me “what I do”
I remember and think of you and your post about being a wife and mother. People thinking they have to “pad” the title with some fancey name like domestic engineer or something of that nature!
Every since reading your post I stand proud when I’m asked the question “So what do you do?”
Wife and Mother is my only answer!
Those words stand alone and are good enough!
I think of you everytime I’m asked that question!
Blessings,
Georgiann
Beth@Not a Bow in Sight says
Awesome post!
I found your blog over at “At the well” today. Your post really spoke to me. I’ve subscribed to your blog and look forward to reading it from now on!
God Bless you!
Kimberly says
I took you advice, grabbed my coffee, and here I am. The Lord has ever so kindly spoke to my heart through what you shared here in this post. I am a mama to seven and have been running this race of trying to be it all. The Lord has brought me to a very humbling place lately of letting go and embracing what really matters. By the way,tears streamed my face as I read Emilys story, it was though I was walking through that moment with you. Dear sister, ecen though I have never lost a child, I have always said if 1 has to go just take me Lord because I could neot bear the pain. But you have encouraged me that wherever the Lords guides, He will provide what we need to get through. Your sister in Christ
Megan Plohocky says
A wonderful reminder with perfect timing. I love that your gonna make your blogs really cozy again. Thank you for all you do for us moms.
Amy says
Thank you, Megan!
Kayla P says
Such a timely post. Even at my age of 35, with 8 children myself, I still feel as though I have much to learn in the way of being a godly wife and mother! I have prayed for years for a Titus 2 woman to be in my life, all the while forgetting that I can be one to someone else as well. I’m sure the opportunity is there, and I just need to ask the Lord to open my eyes to it. I also hear my “self-talk” telling me that I don’t really have anything to share. We all have SOMETHING to share! Thank you for always being an encouragement in my homemaking/homeschooling life, Amy. You have been a Titus 2 woman to me, even if we’ve never met.
Amy says
Thank you, Kayla!