I mentioned in my post on what homeschooled kids think about being homeschooled that homeschooling is an entirely different culture. However, you have to embrace that culture fully before you will see the true benefits of homeschooling.
Sure, you’ll get some of the benefits if you simply school at home, but you will never see the wonderfully rich family life that comes when you quit doing school and start living school.
I had a reader ask me to elaborate on what I meant by embracing this kind of homeschooling culture, but frankly, this isn’t an easy task. I’m going to do my best knowing I will fall miserably short trying to explain this. If you really want an in-depth look at this model of education, I highly suggest these books:
Educating the Wholehearted Child
The Christian Homeschool
Upgrade
Homeschooling from a Biblical Worldview
When Your Rise Up
OK, so what does a rich homeschool family life look like?
1. It doesn’t run about.
Sure, there are a few extracurricular activities, but they are well-thought out and strategically placed so as to minimize any disruption to the family unit. (You can read about our guidelines for choosing extracurricular activities by clicking on the link.)
2. It isn’t busy for the sake of being busy.
While this can definitely include running about, it also relates to school work itself. A family-oriented homeschool culture doesn’t rely on a multitude of workbooks and subjects to keep the members of the household busy.
3. It tailors each child’s education to their needs/interests.
A beneficial education is one that recognizes each child is unique and does not offer a one-size-fits-all curriculum. For instance, it doesn’t teach spelling to a child who is a natural speller and it doesn’t require Calculus of a child who isn’t naturally bent toward numbers. There is no “just because” because everything should have reason and purpose.
4. It integrates life with academics.
Kevin Swanson likens much of the public school experience to taking Bike for 12 years and never getting on one. John Taylor Gatto left the system for this very reason. A homeschool that tries to mimic the very thing the public schools are failing miserably at will miss out on the very essence of what an education ought to be. Give your child opportunities to DO the very things they are learning about. In fact, give them MORE chances to do than chances to simply read about it. Let them LIVE it!
5. It does not rely on age, grades, tests and other external methods of measurement.
A rich homeschooling life full of opportunities to truly learn and glean wisdom cannot be measured by such things. Do not get caught up in what grade your child should be in or how slowly (or quickly) they are working through their studies. Do not fret over keeping grades or administering tests, but seek mastery and again, be aware of your child’s unique gifts, talents, and even shortcomings.
6. It sees the family as a whole made up of individual parts.
We are a family. We live, work, play as a family. Yet, we are unique. My 14 year old is a natural leader, my 11 year old is the family photographer, my 7 year old was born to cook, my 6 year old is a theologian, my 3 year old pushes limits (I’m sure this will some day be a good thing) and my 1 year old pulls heartstrings. Daddy is the outgoing people person and Mommy is the contemplative writer. We each have our place and we recognize our gifts and how those gifts can be used within the family unit until the time when each child sets up their own household. (One book that really helped us to see the need to recognize each child’s place in the family unit is Jumping Ship.)
6. It recognizes and honors in all it does the Truth that God owns it all.
We don’t own our child’s education. God does. We must consciously choose to homeschool for Him. Every subject we teach, every word we speak, every moment we spend training either guides our child toward Christ or toward the world. None of it is neutral. (Read the book Assumptions That Affect Our Lives for more on this important worldview paradigm shift.)
Oh, there is so much more I could say on this topic! I continue to tweak and learn every single school year. I know very few homeschooling families who started out embracing this type of homeschooling, but the ones I know who have come this far will never look back! May you be encouraged to take this journey!
You can read much more about the way we homeschool on The Homeschooling Mother page here at Raising Arrows.
(this post does contain affiliate links)
Roan says
I am especially pondering what you said in #6. Everything we do either points our child to Christ or to the world. Wow! I often tell people that my goal is to raise children who become Christians and live their lives in service to God….if they miss heaven, they have missed it all.
I agree, few families actually begin their homeschool journey like this. It is a process. But such a rewarding one. I am actually sad that my oldest child is 17 and will be beginning her last official year of homeschooling in August. On the other hand, my youngest is 6, and is just at the beginning of his homeschooling.
Thank you for this encouraging post today.
Amy says
It is an entire paradigm shift and we have to wrap our brains around it because we are so used to just doing what we do without really thinking about the long-term consequences. Many blessings to you today!
Jill Grier says
Very well said, Amy! So encouraging!
Amy says
Thank you, Jill! Thank you for introducing me to so many great books on the topic! 😉
Bambi @ In the Nursery of the Nation says
I *love* this post, Amy! If only I had understood these truths in the beginning instead of putting my olders through the ringer 🙂 Thankfully, the Lord’s mercy has covered us because it took me awhile to get out of the school-at-home mentality. I wrote a post just this week called What is Education? http://www.nurseryofthenation.com/2012/07/what-is-education.html Thanks for your steady encouraging posts on homeschooling. Love it!
Leah says
And you can teach your kids to be best friends. Or, at least, better friends. My two (preteen) daughters are 17 months apart and when they were in public school, all they did was fight. I started homeschooling and now they are together 24 hours a day and they argue 90% less than they used to when they were together 3 hours a day.
Marci says
That is exactly the kind of homeschool culture we want! We want to “live” it. Just like you, we are constantly tweaking the way we do things and are FAR from where we want to be. However, we are on our way 🙂 Thanks so much for the book links. I’ve read a couple of them, but will add the others to my list.
Cheryl Doyle-Ruffing says
This is a wonderful post, Amy. It took my husband and me at least 8 years to realize the truths you’ve stated so succinctly, but now there’s no going back. School is illogical, unnatural and a very difficult way to achieve something that should be pretty easy.
Carol says
I’ve been homeschooling my son for six years. Your oh, so interesting post has given me more to think about. Thank you for the book suggestions. I am ordering all of them!
Jamie (@va_grown) says
A “culture” — exactly! This is exactly what I was gleaning as I read Educating the Whole-Hearted Child! Creating a culture of learning–not just putting it in a box or on a calendar that this is learning time and this is fun time and this is family time…all together and interwoven and just THIS IS US.
Can’t wait to look into more of your recommendations!
Cheryl Doyle-Ruffing says
Jamie, I love thinking of the Family Homeschool Culture as “THIS IS US.” I now have a theme song to replay in my mind when I feel pressured to conform: “This is Us” by Emmylou Harris and Mark Knopfler (a fabulous tune). http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ey9kdeOjT3o
Tessa says
I LOVE this post and this is exactly why and how we plan to homeschool our kids. I’m so blessed that God has led me in this direction right from the start. When my oldest was a couple months old I got the idea that homeschooling was the path I wanted to take. After a lot of research and prayer I managed to not only get my husband on board but he is now an advocate. Our boys are still little (4 and 19 months) but I can see the vision already 🙂
Amy says
Wonderful!
Heather Anderson says
This is such an important reminder. Academics are important, but not nearly as important as introducing our children to a way of life that honors the Lord in everything we do. This takes a whole different way of thinking.
Fahrenheit Marketing says
It took my husband and me at least 8 years to realize the truths you’ve stated so succinctly, but now there’s no going back.
Rebecca Shepard says
Hi Amy!!
I found your blog and have been catching up.
As someone who was raised in in a family that had much of what you call a ‘homeschool culture’, – while many of these points sound great on paper, – in real life, they fall very short.
Take #3. You are basically saying that you are not going to push academic work on your child if they are A) really good at something, – or B) if they are not. Ummmm, isn’t that an educators job? To push those who do well to do even better, and perhaps use their skill to excel (and maybe enter a spelling bee!?!?) and on the other hand, – for a child who struggles with a subject, isn’t it your job to help them succeed?
# 5 Tests and other means of measuring a child’s success academically are not going to show whether your child is sweet, or lazy, – but they are not supposed to. If you want to know how much information your child is retaining, and what level work they are really able to do, – test them!! What you do with that information (get stressed out, push them harder, – or simply realize there is work to be done) is a our choice, – but saying that we can be more relaxed and don’t have to worry about it, is kind of like saying that if you suspect a tire is going flat, and refuse to look at it, – you’ll feel calmer.
I don’t mean to be harsh. – I am homeschool pioneer stock, – oldest of twelve, and homeschooled from day one. I grew up surrounded by large homeschool families with very similar worldviews, and have seen the results in my generation.
I am sharing my observations on my blog, – thepresentmom.blogspot.com
I think you and your readers may find it interesting.
I’d love to hear your input!
Rebecca
Amy says
Hi Rebecca! Glad to hear from you. I’m looking forward to checking out your blog!
Because you spoke to 2 points in particular, I’ll address those in particular. #3 – Calculus is an upper level math. It’s not algebra or geometry. It’s not about pushing a child who struggles. It is about knowing how much math a child needs. I did not need calculus. My degree is in English. I would have been crushed under the weight of calculus. Why would I force a child into an upper level math contrary to their natural bent? One size does not fit all, nor should it. As for the spelling, I’m not sure I see the merits of a spelling bee, but beyond that, why should I make a child who naturally spells well go through a spelling curriculum? My natural speller writes and that is where she uses her natural spelling ability. It is useful and she continues to be stretched, not by the spelling itself, but by learning new words and ways to use those words.
#5 – There are instances where tests can be a good gauge; however, tests are quite often administered for the sole purpose of gauging where your child is in relation to the public school standards. Teachers spend their entire school year teaching the test so the children do well. There are much better ways of finding out how much your child is retaining (notebooking, discussions, written essays, etc) that give a more useful measure. If your state requires testing, that is another thing, but in a state that does not require testing, I see no reason to use standardized tests in your homeschool.
I’d be interested to hear why you feel the worldview of your homeschooled years fell short. I can tell you feel very passionately about this, but I do wonder if you are reading your own experiences into my words (which we all do to some extent). I am not sure why seeing my children as unique individuals is detrimental to them, or why having a rich family life would not be a good thing. I’d definitely be interested in conversing about this more!
Blessings,
Amy