“O Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?”
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This story really touched my heart today…
“In the summertime when the grass in the lower valleys withers and dries up, the shepherds seek to lead their sheep up a winding, throny, and stony pathway to the high grazing lands. The sheep, reluctant to take the difficult pathway infested with dangers and hardships, turn back and will not follow. The shepherds make repeated attempts, but the timid sheep will not follow. Finally, a shepherd reaches into the flock and takes a little lamb and places it under his arm…Then he stars up the precipitous pathway. Soon the mother sheep start to follow and afterward the entire flock. At last they ascend the torturous trail to green pastures.”
~from Death of a Little Child
I pray that others follow b/c little Emmy led the way.
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I miss her so much. In fact, the pain is so much more acute than it was in those first days. I feel it deeper and stronger and with more clarity than I did a month ago. But, I am also able to feel the happy moments w/ more clarity than I did before.
It’s as if the Lord shielded us from the full extent of the hurt by clouding our vision…the “fog” I spoke of several weeks back. And as this fog lifts, He allows us to feel the pain, but He also gives us a more vivid picture of beauty to go along with it.
In fact, the weather we are experiencing here today is a perfect illustration…It is bitterly cold today, but the sun is shining bright. Despite the pain we feel, the Lord is still shining mercy and love on us. Though we are chilled to the bone, we have hope of warmth in days to come.
So, yes, we are hurting. And often it is a desperate hurt. A hurt that makes me feel as if I’ll never be okay. The tears are never far from the surface. And there are many, many times I see, or think, or feel something that takes my breath away for a moment because the pain is so overwhelming. Because of this, my beautiful, sweet baby girl is never far from mind…and in many ways I am thankful for that.
God bless you all this Resurrection Day.
God's Guitar Girl says
I know about the Fog. It is a relief to see it lift, but it’s also terrifying because of the raw, gaping wound that you can now so clearly see. You can see just how deeply you love the one lost, and so often the wound is so deep that it seems to not have a bottom to it.Hang in there, dear sister…
Lori Dupre Jackson says
Did you know that even in the daytime, the stars are visible in the heavens? We just can’t see them because of the glare of the sun. I’ve heard that if you are in the bottom of a well, you can see the stars at high noon – because of all the darkness.I’m praying that God will send a million stars to you – so that you can have lots of beautiful things to look at while you’re in the well.We Love You!
Anonymous says
Christ’s resurrection is a promise that you will be with your sweet baby again. I will be praying for you and the pain you are in. I only “know” you from this blog but I would like to pray for you and your family.Laura
guinever says
Sorry to be so silent. I have continued to hold you in my prayers every day and watch the RSS feed for your blog so I know when you’re writing more. The memory box you received is one of the most precious things I have ever seen!Christ is risen.He is risen indeed.We do not grieve without hope.How precious the thought of our daughters in heaven, dancing and singing and glorifying Him.“…God is holding her.He is holding me.Separate we are now,but we will be reunited…”
Steven Jenkins says
Thank you for sharing that story. I’m sure that many will be touched by the story of Emmy’s short life! You will be amazed one day by the way God will use her story. Praying for you during this pain, and thankful that you can see the beauty now too! (((HUGS)))
Anonymous says
We cry with you and we love you in the Spirit of Our Lord Jesus Christ Whose ways are past finding out or completely understood. In prayer I lift you and your family to the Throne of Grace asking the God of all comfort to pour out His help on you. I cannot imagine the strength you possess now. You are blessed by the presence of Our Lord and I am so thankful for you sharing in the pain. It is deeply ministering to me to hear the Lord’s comfort from the inside of you out. Your Resurrection Day post is one of the most beautiful applications of JESUS, the Good Shepherd, I have ever heard. Isaiah 40:10-11 says “Behold, the Lord GOD will come with strong hand, and his arm shall rule for him: behold, his reward is with him, and his work before him. He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.†This has comforted me many times in labor but the Lord brought it to mind while picturing your description of JESUS carrying Emmy. Emmy’s life and purpose brings new meaning to this Scripture for me and I am so thankful. I will follow Him all the days of my life. Blessed be the name of the Lord.Lynn EllisonWife to GlennMother to Jordan, Grace, Walker, Major, Hunter, Hope, Glory, Justice, Mercy and Promise
Anonymous says
Amy, I prayed for you many times yesterday. I pray that your days will continue to get brighter and the memories of your precious Emmy will be surrounded with love and peace. Hang in there, my dear friend!In love,Crystal S.